#30MoreDays — Blog — Kristy M. Ayala, M.A.Kristy M. Ayala, M.A.

Hello!

We made it to April! It feels like a big moment to know that it’s officially April and this is a new month and a new beginning. Even though we’re still sheltering in place, apart… but together… it still feels like this new month is a breath of fresh air and an opportunity to tap into a fresh start.

There’s a definitive shift in this energy, you can probably feel it too, it’s almost palpable. While we’re still sheltering in place, the feeling of this #30moredays feels much different than the last several weeks. The issues that were prescient at the beginning of this stay at home order while still on the forefront seem to be impacting us at home in a different way as we move forward. Are you feeling this too?

There’s a feeling now that we’re all in this together, and that we in some way have found a bit of a rhythm in how we move through our day to day life at this time. We can see how neighbors are supporting each other, the kindness of strangers being shared online, and even the human experience of overwhelm and frustration being shared over the inter-webs. This common theme of connection even though we’re apart has helped us to feel less alone and in many ways seen and understood. The irony of finding community while being inside is so surreal but so powerful at the same time.

So many people have some things sorted out that were up in the air 3 weeks ago.

Maybe you’re finding your groove as a sudden + unexpected homeschooling professional.
Maybe your littles are streaming their classes via zoom and now you’re a zoom expert even if you’ve never heard that word in this context before all of this.
Maybe you’ve found or reconnected to your love of cooking, baking, and hanging out in the kitchen.
Maybe you’ve made an effort to create and participate in group chat calls, again getting your zoom skills to a professional level!
Maybe you’re enjoying being home and really reconnecting to your space, surroundings, and the healing quality of home.
Maybe you’re getting some projects and items checked off your to do list.
Maybe you’ve picked up your musical instrument, knitting needles or crochet hooks, paintbrush, garden gloves, or a book you’ve been meaning to get to when you had some down time.
Maybe you’re still working full time from home and you’ve found a way to adjust to a new normal work wise.
Maybe you and your partner are both working from home full time and are finding a way to get into a rhythm in your work space and style.
(Do you need it silent while your partner works best while blasting music and talking super loud to their clients?.....Does this seem super specific? It is, because this is a peek into my situation, lol)
Maybe you (or your loved one) is an essential professional and are working on the front lines at this time. We all see you, yes, all of us, the global community see’s you and we appreciate you!

As we move into this next phase of sheltering in place, I see that a deep focus on self care and gentility is very important.

The first phase focused a great deal on what felt like an overnight adjustment to nearly ever part of our day to day life. A crash course in how to do everything differently beginning now was the overall feeling.

Sheltering In Place 2.0 feels more like a deep call to gentility, slowing down, and being very gentle with ourselves. Yes, all the things still need to be done but this feels different than last month.

The majority of everyone I worked with or talked to last month was scrambling to do all the things they needed to do while also trying to find ways to keep busy since they couldn’t leave the house. One of the biggest themes that showed up for people was an intense level of stress, anxiety, and the biggest one forgetting to breathe.

Yes, forgetting to breathe.

Maybe you’re noticing right now that you’ve been forgetting to breathe too.

When we’re under stress, the body goes into a natural stress response and we begin to either hold our breath or breathe through our mouths. (No, mouth breathing isn’t the natural way the body is set up to breathe.)

It makes perfect sense that during a crisis all of us would experience an increase in stress which turns on our natural stress response.

So, making a concerted effort to remember to breathe right now is very important. You can set an alert on your phone to give you a gentle reminder. You can place a sticky note on your fridge, laptop, or bathroom mirror. You can ask someone you live with to gently remind you to breathe if they notice you’re holding your breath. Any ways that support you in breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth will be very beneficial for you right now.

Even taking 3 deep breaths in through your nose slowly and exhaling out through your mouth will help to reset your body and help to clear away stress and tension from your body and mind.

This month as you set your intentions for April and for your #30moredays maybe you can make the theme about self care and self love.

Sometimes these become buzz words and people think oh yeah I know all about that but they don’t really implement them into their daily lives. This is a perfect time to practice these very important support services for yourself and the people sheltering in place with you.

I’ve included some ideas to support you in slowing down and being gentle with yourself during shelter in place 2.0. This is just a small list to help you generate some of your own ideas, this is by no means a be all end all list.

Quiet Time:
Yes, remember quiet time? Schedule this into your schedule daily this month. A 10 minute block a day will make a huge impact in how you feel. You can practice conscious breathing, meditate, or journal during your quiet time. Please don’t use your quiet time to scroll as it tends to ramp up stress and anxiety and this is time for you to reset, restore, and replenish.

Walk It Out:
Many communities are still allowing walks in your neighborhood; if you’re one of these folks, lace up your shoes and walk it out. You’ll physically move stress out of your mind and body and you’ll increase your endorphins while also getting some much needed fresh air and sunshine.

Music Over Scrolling:
Listening to music soothes and supports the nervous system and actually increases mood.
Scrolling Instagram or whichever platform you love can increase tension, stress, and fear energies. So, opt for listening to music rather than going into a scrolling hole.

Slow is the New Hustle:
Focus on Moving Slower. Breathing Slower. Doing Things Slower.
You may notice that you feel guided to push yourself harder, to go faster, to get it all done, to not stop until everything is finished. When you notice this, breathe and take a moment to refocus. This isn’t a time to be pushing yourself to go against your natural body rhythms but to reconnect and honor your natural pace which is much slower than what you’ve become used to in last 2 decades.

Get Grounded:
When we reconnect to our true selves, our body, and the natural world we become more grounded, focused, and in tune with our real feelings, thoughts, emotions, and sense of self; we feel more like the real us. If you have house plants, water, propagate, and slow down with them. Maybe you can plant a little garden on your balcony or in a patch of dirt in your back yard. Smudge your home, spruce up your space, get outside and if it’s warm enough take off your socks and shoes and put your feet in the grass while you watch the clouds roll by.

Lean Into What Soothes Your Soul:
Choose to do things that you haven’t been able to do but genuinely love. It may be something that you haven’t done in years or it might be something seemingly simple like playing a board game or putting together a puzzle. Make a pot of tea and drink out of your favorite fancy “waiting for the perfect day” tea cup. Make something, bake something, do the DIY’s, dry flowers and herbs, learn to make those tinctures you’ve been wanting to make, wear your fancy pajamas just because they make you feel good…or anything that soothes your soul.

This is a perfect time to honor and truly practice real self care and self love.

Go slow.
Do what you can right now but honor your needs at the same time.
Breathe.
Reconnect to you and honor and invest in your needs, wellbeing, and rest right now.

I’m sending you so much love and support from my teeny tiny corner of the world!

I’m still working and available to support you right now if you feel guided to schedule a session with me.

With so much love and gentility,
Kristy~xoxo

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